Honzo is twenty-six years old, but has never had a serious romantic relationship. Ever since he was a teenager, he didn’t trust himself, was anxiously afraid of rejection and couldn’t approach girls. Today, he partially overcame his shyness, but he is not doing well in partner relationships. The meeting always ends after a few meetings, usually at the instigation of the counterpart. His life is also complicated by his addiction to porn. He shared his story in the podcast Co z tebe bude?!
Where his low self-confidence when establishing relationships could come from, Honza has already wondered many times. He believes that there were several reasons, but he sees one in his childhood. “When I was young, I behaved in a way that my parents didn’t like, they told me that if I behaved like that, no girl would ever want me,” he recalls. In addition, he did not consider himself as strong as other peers and was troubled by his short stature. But he no longer sees it as a disadvantage.
Today, he tries to date with alternating breaks, but he does not meet with success. He feels that women keep giving him the same reasons why not to continue. When he was younger, he blamed them for it. “I was pretty bitter about it when I was a teenager and I think it’s very fortunate that Andrew Tate wasn’t famous then,” recalls the misogynist influencer, who is currently under house arrest and faces charges including forcing several women to film pornography .
Honza admits that there are times when he feels alone and would like a romantic relationship, but at other times he is happy for his single life. He mentions that he is a relatively solitary person, and even in a partnership he would need enough space for himself. However, the ideal of a long-term relationship still appears in his imagination. “It doesn’t have to be the passionate romance that movies and mainstream culture have forced upon us, but I can imagine having someone by my side to face life together could be nice,” she muses.
Porn at your fingertips
His life is also complicated by his addiction to porn, which he developed at a relatively young age and which went hand in hand with the fact that he was unable to establish a relationship. “It was reinforced by each other. I’m the first generation to have porn close at hand. Whenever I felt like watching it, I did. When I became interested in girls as a teenager and my hormones kicked in, I needed to release my sexual desire. It would be normal to try to discharge it consensually with a partner. But I was afraid to approach girls and started to discharge it with porn. I found myself in a spiral,” he describes how the addiction arose.
This affects both his sexual preferences and libido. When he looks at him too much, women don’t turn him on and he can’t enjoy sex. He currently lacks the motivation to fight his addiction because it is an escape for him from other problems he is currently dealing with in his life. However, in general, he feels that his state of mind regarding relationships is improving. “Sometimes it’s better and sometimes worse. But it helps me in the long term if I have a project to work on, maintain social contacts and do sports,” he enumerates. You can find the interview with Honza in all podcast applications: Soundcloud, Spreaker, Spotify, Apple Podcasts and Google Podcasts.
Photo author: Tomáš Vocelka
What will become of you?!
A podcast about the internal problems of young people in a rapidly changing world. It deals, among other things, with gender identity, the relationship to one’s own body and professional crisis. Individual episodes are moderated by Tomáš Maca and Clara Zanga. Episode 1 of the podcast introduces Yuki and his convoluted journey to non-binary. The 2nd part is dedicated to Matěj, who rejects the boyish idea of manhood with a humorous perspective. She washes, irons, doesn’t drive a car and takes care of her daughter. The 3rd part in Anna’s story reveals what problems a beautiful and intelligent woman faces in a man’s world. (March 19) Episode 4 shows that you can be a handsome young man and still hate your body. Jirka is an artist and a model, but he can’t look at himself in the mirror. (March 26) The 5th episode offers the perspective of Míša, a Czecho-Vietnamese woman who copes with stereotypes in the country where she was born, as well as in her parents’ homeland. (April 2) The 6th episode is about Adéla, who gained weight during the pandemic and the people around her show it inappropriately at meetings. (April 9) The 7th episode is about Nicol, who is almost enslaved by the operation of the theater cafe. After complete burnout, she found surprising relief in corporate. (April 16) Episode 8 of the podcast, on the other hand, shows the other side of the corporation. Sabina gained 25 kilos in a toxic company and developed anxiety, for which she is still being treated today. (April 23) The 9th episode of the podcast is about sickness from inactivity. People usually burn out from overwork, but Anna-Marie fell into depression due to boredom at work (April 30) The 10th episode of the podcast is dedicated to Alžběta, who lived in a partnership at the expense of her needs and is now happily single (May 7)
